As I created my list of 25 people today, I became aware of the lostness of my family and was burdened. My parents are first generation Christians and none of my grandparents, uncles, aunts, or cousins attend church or have a growing relationship with Christ. If you asked them most of them would say they believe in Christ, but none of their actions show pursuit towards him or effort in building a relationship with him. I’ve been praying for various family members for years now. But tonight the realization hit me that none of my family (except my parents and sisters) are disciples pursuing Christ. My heart is so hurt. I love my family so much and I just want them to experience fulfillment in Christ. My parents have tried to talk to my relatives numerous times but they always come back rejected. I’ve watched my family members try and fill the Christ sized holes in their hearts with the various fallacies of this world but yet, they never find fulfillment. It’s like watching a sick person die through a hospital window when you have their cure on the other side, but they won’t unlock the door and let you in to give it to them. Only Christ and his Holy Spirit can change my family’s hearts. I pray that He moves in them and awakens them. My hope is that a yearning for the presence of God will bloom within them.
Also this morning my preacher taught on one of the Beatitudes, so I thought it was fitting to make that my verse to meditate on today…
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven”
– Matt 5:3-
It’s also fitting for me today as I am burdened by the lost hearts of my family because it reminds me that we are blessed when we are poor in spirit, at the end of our ropes, and have nothing left because that’s when we fully rely on Christ. That’s kind of where I’m at with my family, I’ve realized nothing I can do will save them. I’m powerless and fresh out of ideas, but in my weakness Christ has full power and authority to move.